BACON: The Greatest Thing in the World (Video).

The salty, savory, succulent gift from the food gods, the tastiest treat to ever come from an animal, and the greasy little slice of decadence, affectionately referred to as “meat candy.” This beloved meat treat finds its way into salads, omelets, burgers, soups, and even ice cream. It’s served – nay, demanded – for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. It’s a key component of dozens of favorite dishes and a welcome addition to many, many others. It’s the only food known to mankind that you can add to any dish and instantly make it better.

There’s only one food worthy of such power – the almighty bacon.This delectable meat sensation comes from a pig and is typically cured in one of several ways. Depending on the “type” of bacon and where you are in the world, the actual meat may be taken from different parts of the pig. The bacon we Americans know – or “streaky bacon” to the British – comes from the fatty (read: delicious) sides of pork belly.

The curing process for American bacon generally involves soaking the pork belly in brine solution (that may contain other flavoring) or curing with a salt rub, followed by smoking the meat (more opportunities to add flavor there), then oven cooking and cooling to make it easier to cut, and finally packaging and sending the finished product along to your grocer.

Now, there ARE other types of bacon – like Canadian bacon from a pig’s back or loin – but for our purposes, let’s focus on the strip-cut, salty goodness of the bacon we know and love.

It’s got a long, illustrious history, as you might expect from a food this delicious.

Packaged, sliced bacon was first patented by the legendary Oscar Meyer in 1924, and BLT sandwiches first rose to popularity after World War II ended, allowing supermarkets to stock fresh produce year-round.

That’s just a slice of the modern history, though. Salted, cured pork belly has been around since 1500 BC, invented (discovered?) by the ancient Chinese and carried on by ancient Greeks and Romans. In medieval Europe, salted pork became a low-cost, easily preserved source of meat. Smoked pork belly, even in that day and age, was a sought after delicacy.

The word “bacon” has its origins deeply embedded in history as well. Stemming from pre-12th century French “bako,” Germanic “bakkon,” and Old Teutonic “backe” – all referring to the back of a pig – the word “bacoun” was first used in 16th Century England to describe salted pork belly, eventually becoming the word we know as “bacon” today.

Now, in the present day, bacon-mania is everywhere! There’s bacon-flavored vodka, bacon dog treats, candy with bacon, clothing with bacon designs, websites and YoutTube channels devoted to all things bacon, bacon scented air freshener, bacon-flavored lip balm. You can even populate your website-in-progress with Bacon Ipsum placeholder text!

The American bacon obsession is perfectly justified, or at least we think so. Maybe some of it’s a little weird (like bacon toothpaste), but otherwise, why wouldn’t you be obsessed with this absolutely perfect, downright historic food that lies at the pinnacle of deliciousness?

Why would we go all out like this for a food that wasn’t absolutely life changing? Think about it. How excited do you get when you hear something is wrapped in lettuce? How pumped do you get when you smell quinoa cooking? Would the water chestnut even be considered food without bacon?

Of every available snack out there, nothing compares. Bacon is so good, they make a substitute for vegans. VEGANS! They’ve sworn off all animal products, but couldn’t swear off the taste of bacon – no matter how fake and awful vegan bacon is.

There are some downsides to eating bacon strips left and right. Some doctors claim that eating bacon is bad for you. Well, that’s a risk well worth taking. If you die, you’ll die happy and full of bacon.

A more pressing issue is that bacon makes you devalue other foods. After a while, all you think about is how much better everything would be wrapped in bacon. You’ll even start going to crazy lengths to wrap stuff in bacon, like turkeys, chickens, and hot dogs. This is normal. You can live with this.

The biggest concern of binge bacon eating is developing a case of the meat sweats. If you’ve never had a chance to live through this harrowing experience, then you haven’t truly lived. You’ve probably broken out into a sweat on a hot summer day. Imagine that same feeling except instead of the oppressive heat, it’s an impressive pile of thick cut, applewood smoked bacon. The more bacon you shove in your bacon hole, the more furious the sweating becomes. As you wipe the droplets of sweat from your brow with one of your greasy bacon holders, you check the thermostat; it’s 66 degrees, yet you can’t stop sweating. But somehow, through it all, you’re still the happiest person on Earth. That’s a meat sweat.

So, long story short, there aren’t a lot of negatives to the bacon life.

Most likely we’re telling you what you already know. That’s ok. It’s always good to take time to appreciate the finer things in life. In other words, stop and smell the bacon. Now that you’re sufficiently hungry, why don’t you start frying up some of the good stuff then swing by the Revel office so we can stuff our bacon starved faces.

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